Sunday, March 18, 2018

to the Other


Show your face, 
you, 
my comrade 
in the torments 
of her unspeakable beauty, 
which haunts my heart 
with a thousand fantasies, 
which blinds me 
to the world 
and its foolish tricks.

You are familiar with the path 
her lustful spirit treads, 
that shines bright in her afterglow, 
mocking my eyes 
for futilely worshiping 
the ground beneath her feet.

You bask in her closeness;
you breathe in the air
which mournfully bears 
the fragrance of her body. 

The moon sees you 
from its perch in the sky, 
as it once saw the dalliances 
of many an unfulfilled night.

You’ve touched that face, 
those cheeks and lips, 
to the memories of which 
I devote my life. 
You’ve beheld those eyes, 
that aloof, bewitching gaze; 
you know my life is not a waste.

The agonies of love 
have been equally kind to us, 
to you and I; 
a kindness that knows no limits,
or end. 
What this passion gives to me, 
or takes, 
I can hope to explain to no other 
but you, my friend.

It humbles me, 
this love, 
and makes me one with the beaten. 
It brings me new friends: 
melancholy,
and an endless ache of the heart. 
It acquaints me 
with the dishonor of abjection, 
and reveals to me
the cruel mysteries 
behind ashen faces 
and helpless sighs.

When they huddle together 
and weep, 
those whose eyes won’t shed tears, 
for fear; 
when the sustenance of the meek 
is snatched from their mouths, 
by the beasts 
bred of wealth, 
and stealth; 
when the honest toils of love 
are sold short, 
and the streets run red 
with the blood of the powerless; 

a fire consumes my soul, 
a rage 
I cannot contain; 
so patient through the travails of love, 
why my heart now loses control, 
I cannot explain.

An Inspiration from Faiz Ahmed Faiz's "Raqib Se!"



Friday, November 17, 2017

birthday '17

shaa'er ka jashn e salgirah hai, sharaab la
mansab, khitaab, rutba, unhein kya nahi mila
bas naqs hai toh itna k mamdooh ne koi
misraa kisi kitaab k shayaa'n nahi likha

- Faiz

Sunday, October 29, 2017

offended, outraged, totally pissed off!

Our Fleeting Moral Outrage; Our Collective Social Amnesia

https://dailytimes.com.pk/131230/fleeting-moral-outrage-collective-social-amnesia/

And now, a draft of my thank you note to the Daily Times:

"Dear DT! If your subs are going to go fuckin' nuts on editing a submission, at least pass their masterwork by the original author before publishing it for the whole fucking world to see. You've defaced this piece beyond recognition. Everybody who's reading this is thinking this Multani boy doesn't even know jack about basic tenses, much less stringing together a decent sentence. It's moolah ffs, not mullah!! Moolah means money. How does mullah even make sense where your bachas have inserted it? Piece-of-shit editing! And screw you for ruining my most heartfelt rant yet. Love."

To send or not to send, that is the question.

The original, as I wrote it, is at the link for fair comparison: Our Fleeting Moral Outrage

Friday, September 08, 2017

Partition: The Seraiki Side of the Story

Salute to my forebears who acquitted themselves with honor, nobility and an uncompromising respect for humanity in a time when the entire world seemed to be going to hell. Dada, Nana Jan, Nano, Addi Amma, thank you for teaching me what it means to be a decent human being, above everything else.

Partition - Alternative Perspectives

http://dailytimes.com.pk/blog/07-Sep-17/partition-alternative-perspectives


Thursday, August 10, 2017

dreams of you

dreams of you

in a drunken haze
in power-plays
as the novice lays
his hands on you

dreams of you

your yelps
and moans

your body heat
your heart of stone

your heavy sighs
your little lies

and the rhythm of love
that cracks your bones

dreams of you

from silken days
of easy thrills
and artless ways

before foreign shores
before drugs
and whores
before dry-eyed tears
and tight-shut doors

when you sang your song
and I played along
“you are mine,
and I am yours.”


no fair!!

You give them an article. They carry a letter. Never again!

Seraiki SOS! 

http://www.thefridaytimes.com/tft/letters-180/


Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Rohi

a strange spring's abloom
far away
in the desert

where my foolish love resides,
and a thousand lovers
with bewitching eyes

still, I remain
a traveler
without destination

Original:

Rohi di ajab bahaar dissey
jith maen nimaanri da yaar vassey
uth ashiq lakh te hazaar vassey
hik maen musafir bewatan

- Khwaja Ghulam Farid 

Thursday, November 17, 2016

birthday '16

the madness of faith
and vanities of time,
frigid desire,
sorry self-deceit

a heat
that is cold
and a wetness
that’s dry,

and the noise
of a breaking heart,
inaudible,
among empty moans
and unfulfilled sighs,

are your story

in the arms of love,
my love.

in the stranger’s embrace,
you say?

pleasure for show,
your cries
for attention

living the moment
in borrowed
sensation

dishonest eyes
despoiled hair
sublets on skin
caramel or fair
consummate guile
circumspect glee?

that is the place
you’re meant to be!

Friday, August 19, 2016

How We Are Failing Our Children

Amid the swirling horrors of an unabated spate of child abductions, child pornography rings, incessant child sexual abuse, rape and murder, and numerous other excesses against society’s most defenseless members a mere fraction of which get reported, one would imagine that the country would be preparing to go to war in the protection of its future, i.e. our children.[1] Parliament (and provincial assemblies) would be scrambling to debate the merits of current legislation, pushing through more effective laws and holding the state apparatus to account on implementation. The media, with their monopoly on national opinion-making, would bring their massive influence to bear on making the plight of the child the no. 1 burning issue in the public’s collective attention. Society at large would engage in mass soul-searching to identify and root out the causes, circumstances and societal contradictions that pave the way for our children being brutalized, physically and psychologically.

What we have instead is a spokesperson for the party-in-power appearing on prime-time TV to correct facts: only 132, and not 700 or more, children are missing without a trace from Lahore since the beginning of 2016. And that somehow makes everything better. Senior police officials conclude that most missing children are runaways from home and not really kidnapped. But surely, there are at least a few that have been abducted in broad daylight without as much as a ransom call or note. There are rumors of an organ-harvesting network in operation. If that is true, it is surely being abetted by qualified medical workers and customs and police officials. What is the breadth and intensity of the investigation if the default setting is: he ran away from home? If the glorious guardians of our national consciousness, the Parliament and other law-making bodies, cannot convene to consider, e.g. how a Criminal Procedure Code given by our colonial masters in 1898 is still valid today; why laws made for Child Protection in recent years have remained largely toothless especially in the context of federal legislation and provincial execution; why children-specific bills are needed based on scientific studies investigating whether things like rape, emotional and physical trauma and being exploited have different long-term physical and psychological impact on adults and children; and, how do you even define a child in this class-, sect- and caste-crazed society, let them at least sit together and decide upon an arbitrary national threshold of tolerability for abducted/raped children. 132 is good enough. Heaven forbid if it were ever to be 133.[2] [3] [4]

The apathy of our power elites (media included) towards anything other than the high-drama of political power-play is nothing out of the ordinary. While the elite unabashedly exhibits callous disregard, the people seem to suffer from mass denial bordering on self-delusion. A standard refrain is, especially in the context of child sexual abuse, that when the phenomenon is rampant in ‘developed’ Western nations, how can Pakistan be expected to eradicate it. This line especially hurts when coming from good-hearted, well-meaning people. My only question to such people is, isn’t the decadent West only just materially advantaged while we, as a nation, have always prided ourselves on being more spiritually and morally upright? Isn’t the basic premise for our entire national existence the religion of Islam? Nothing is more symptomatic of a diseased soul than raping, seducing, or otherwise molesting, a child. Shouldn’t our superior spiritual strengths have ensured the minimal incidence of such vile crimes in our society vis-à-vis the immoral West that is going to hell anyway despite its material advantages? Or should we admit that there is also a disease within our souls that begs to be treated with all the scientific and spiritual remedies available to us in the 21st century.

For perspective, my reading of history leads me to believe, that pederasty, i.e. a sexual preference for young boys, is not as much a legacy of our Hindu heritage, blamed as it is for most social ills in present-day Pakistan, as it is of our cherished Arabian-Persian-Turkic tradition. While ancient Hinduism is rife with the abominable tradition of child marriages, objective accounts from Mughal, Ottoman, Abbasid and Persian courts and the life-stories of notable rulers, warriors, poets and even revered saints point to a vast history of pederasty in this region. Countries like Afghanistan are also still grappling with the ramifications of this widely and openly practiced phenomenon, locally known as ‘Bacha Baazi’.[5] [6] Interestingly, boys who have been thus exploited are culturally expected to go on and inflict the same upon others as they themselves grow into adulthood. This forms a vicious chain that is unending across generations. From a six-year old boy hanging dead after being sodomized on the second floor of a mosque to the largely-forgotten depredations of the Kasur and Swat child pornography rings to the hastily-hushed and hardly ever investigated rumors surrounding our religious seminaries to the regular nuggets on the periphery of the daily news, it is about time we wake up to this hideous reality, this inherited malaise that afflicts us. This is not to say, of course, that girl-children are any safer in Pakistan. Data suggests that no child-type is safe from sexual predators in our country; rich or poor, boy or girl, disabled or orphaned, housed or homeless.[7]

In 2007, Iranian President Ahmedinejad made an international mockery of himself by claiming that there were no homosexuals in his country.[8] By turning a blind eye to how children in Pakistan are suffering just because the fire has not come home yet, many of us stand to make similar fools of ourselves, especially in the realms of conscience. Not everything from Javed Iqbal, serial rapist and murderer of over a 100 children in Lahore in the 90s, to the current, uninhibited row of unexplained kidnappings, is an anomalous stain on the beautiful face of our country that will go away by itself. Only after mustering the courage to recognize the issue can the urgently needed conversation on how elitism, socioeconomic stratification, wage disequilibrium, systemic governance failures, notions of shame and honor, clerical irresponsibility, broken and displaced families, absence of a social security net, dysfunctional gender attitudes and educational systems, and the lack of a sense of collective social responsibility towards children, all feed into leaving our children so vulnerable to exploitation.[9] And this conversation needs to occur at all echelons of society. Comparisons with other countries or arguing over incidence figures represent a defeatist, self-serving policy that undermines an unambiguous, absolutely uncompromising attitude that any self-respecting people should have as to the protection of their children.

We, in the present-day, are custodians of our future in the form children that we are bringing up. Children are the weakest members of society, needing an external voice to articulate their needs and protect their human rights as they lack the intellectual and physical capacity themselves. No code of human decency, religious or secular, looks kindly upon a people who stand in brazen disregard of the plight of the weakest among them. More poignantly, no society that remains in denial about gross injustice within itself has any right to harbor any self-gratifying notions of grandeur, material or spiritual.




[1] http://sahil.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/FIVE-YEAR-ANALYSIS-200-2011.pdf
[2] http://www.dawn.com/news/1243231
[3] http://ombudsmanpunjab.gov.pk/children-complaint-office/child-right-acts-laws/
[4] http://www.dawn.com/news/1199985
[5] http://www.dawn.com/news/1265215
[6] http://www.nytimes.com/2015/09/21/world/asia/us-soldiers-told-to-ignore-afghan-allies-abuse-of-boys.html?_r=0
[7] http://sahil.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/FIVE-YEAR-ANALYSIS-200-2011.pdf
[8] https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2007/sep/25/nohomosexualityhere
[9] http://tribune.com.pk/story/943616/evil-within-child-sexual-abuse-cases-rise-by-17-says-unicef-funded-study/

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Sectarian Conflict in the Middle East

There is something sweet about firsts that never fails to charm. I remember when I was turning this paper in for publication, I thought I'd be elated when it finally got carried. Strangely, now that the moment has arrived, all I feel is this quiet satisfaction. And the relief that now I can safely forget about it after lunch!!

So, without much ado, my first ever formal publication as carried in the Summer 2016 edition of the Heinz Journal of Public Policy:

Topic: Sectarian Conflict in the Middle East and the Rise of ISIS: An Analysis of Saudi & Iranian Roles & Influences
Link: http://journal.heinz.cmu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Heinz-Journal-Vol13-Issue-11.pdf
Date: May 23, 2016

And may this fly as low as possible under the radars of raw religious emotion and knee-jerk reaction!

Friday, April 29, 2016

for a moment

tears unwept
wails unwailed
are the silent songs
with which
your unspeakable beauty
I make eternal

do not
for a moment
glorify your loud laments
your sniveling shows of grief

for they are
the murderer's theatrics
at the scene of the crime

the anguish of
a canny tradesman
only counting losses
after breaking the deal

do not
for a moment
ridicule my silence

it is the dignity
the mystique
that so lovingly hides you

do not
for a moment
rip off that mask

it is more real
than you

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

birthday '15

in corners dark,
deserted places
lovers don
a thousand faces

veiled, they writhe,
and jar, and bend
bodies hunger
souls, they spend

through frenzied gasps
some words are spoke
in empty eyes,
all pledges broke

at time's hand,
my fleeting friend
the lying stops
the kisses end

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

a plea

Shades of hesitant conversation, and fiery eyes, angry, yet sad: I don’t want to lose sight of these visions in the dark night of penitence that has come upon me. So listen, listen to this feeble voice, before the vulgar waves of the oceans separating us drown it out. My life begins in death; wailing, sobbing, trying to find for itself a face in a mirror of horrors. Radiant visages, muted, motionless, lie concealed in their unreachable homes of impenetrable darkness, shimmering away their eternal grace. I try and steal their glow, just to find my own way. But I do not always succeed. I stumble, I fall. Silver-tongued wraiths appear to me in friendly forms, leading me astray with dishonest enticements. I follow blindly; I let greed and desire be my guides. Until I reach a crossroads where all the world is hostile to me, and I myself am my biggest enemy. I fight these demons, individually, and all at once. I fight them with all I’ve got. I fight them until my sanity dangles by a hair from the edge of oblivion. It is a bitter fight; it is an unending fight. It is a fight that leads me to unfamiliar places; places where nobody recognizes me, and I struggle to recognize myself. It becomes a strange imprisonment where polite nods and soft smiles define the parameters of my solitary confinement; it becomes a strange exile where amidst the cacophony of a thousand voices, there is every opportunity to carry on uninterrupted conversations with the self. I crane my neck above the crowd to try and steal a peek at the familiarity left so far behind. I see brilliant flashes of color and light; I see two souls fusing; I hear the music of joyful celebration. But the odes to love and happiness that the flute sings reach my ears only as tunes of lament and mourning. They evoke times that were simple, and magical; unchanging and absolute. Times when we did not have to scour a thousand strangers’ faces in hopes of finding a faint glimmer of lost familiarity. But remember, you: the custodian of my blood; the keeper of my soul. I will come back for it; I will come back to them. And you. And you will have the power to decide whether when I look my soul in the eyes again, it stares back at me with a stranger’s empty gaze, or embraces me with the warm ease of a long lost friend. Be just, you; be merciful. A weary pilgrim come home deserves not to be castaway as driftwood on the seas of self-loathing and regret; a broken man deserves a chance to be one again with fragments of his soul.

Sunday, January 05, 2014

twelve years & 99 minutes

It’s like this. You go get something, seemingly out of the ordinary, actually, not so much, and the world trips over itself showering praise. Amid the thunderous applause however, you yourself do not know what to make of your achievement. So you flounder about, doing one thing, then another, recklessly exercising the only tangible element of your personality: a bloated ego. And one day, without even knowing it, you fall in line, a line of sheep more like, mindlessly trying to do what every Bum, Dick and Hairy in the world is doing. But then you fail, completely, miserably, falling flat and hard on your face. And you just can’t deal with that. So it becomes a silent obsession, gnawing away at the back of your mind as your body feigns patrician swagger, eating away at your soul as it sinks deeper in the quicksand of its own poverty. Your ego becomes the stone wall behind which you yourself are the guinea pig in the experiments of your own psyche.

In time, you find distractions. You drown yourself in indulgences that often have your entrails hanging at your mouth. You tumble down culs-de-sac of love, always mistaking the heat of the moment for a promise of a lifetime. You delude yourself into believing that you, of all people, have a handle on the Truth. And despite all that, the fixation remains, biding its time in some remote corner of your brain, awaiting the perfect moment to grasp you by the nape. And then it happens. You are weighed, measured and found wanting in comparison to wild, alien enticements. Your sun-burnt patch of irises does not match up to the red and the gold of the other side. And just like that, a dormant ambition becomes a burning need screaming for gratification.

You align your entire existence in aid of your self-centered motives. You let life take its course, ordained by higher powers, acquiesced in by you. But secretly, you load every dice in your favor. In the public eye, you are the epitome of blissful sangfroid. In private, you’re a madman with a grudge, an insecure freak dying to prove yourself. You work hard, you plug all holes, and this time, you don’t take yourself prisoner. And you have it. The world once again is up in clamorous applause. Accolades filter in from far and wide. You are king of your world one more time. And just as before, there is emptiness, cluelessness, but mixed with unconscionable amounts of guilt. For in your journey from crest to trough to crest again on the sinusoid that is your life, you have created nodes, old and new, that are the basis of all that you are. Tears glisten in some innocent, unsuspecting eyes and endear all the world’s tears to you. Silenced voices lecture you on sanity, and you hear them better than the noise around you. Faces forever interred in darkness are your beacons to the meaning of life, and you prefer those visages to the light of day.

Hindsight constructs a reality that is impossible to disengage from. The Truth now appears different from what it used to be. The Truth now redefines your conceptions of priority. The Truth demands confrontation with all your well-concealed dualities. The Truth resides in a life-force far greater, far more valuable than yours. The Truth, however, retains its surreal volatility. The Truth, nonetheless, must be listened to.

Sunday, November 17, 2013

birthday '13

ajab hai vasl mein ye bhi andaam e khu hona
makeen e naar so hona, tappish ki aarzu hona

nazar gudaaz, badan majrooh, soorat ashk aalood
namaaz e ishq mein laazim hai ba-wuzu hona

sakoot e shab aur hungaam e bosa e rukh e yaar
mumkin ho kahan dil e zaar se guft-o-gu hona

har gham zamaane ka jo ho gosha e gham e dil
bohat ma'asoom hota hai ye mojza e aansu hona

kisi maar e sangh kharaash ki kya auqaat o wujood?
likha qismet mein ho gar nazrana e gaysu hona

sabhi havaadis e lazzaat se charagar ho kar
jigger ka kaam hai ayeeneh k roobaru hona

jab ishq hee rehta ho beniaz e sood o zayan
munajat mein kyun ho naffey ki justoju hona?

har zeest k maare se bekhauf ye keh doh
jila hai zeest ki raahon mein be-aabru hona

khwab toot gaye, thehr gayi mohabbat ki mehak
khiraaj e umr hua behr e Mazloom surkhru hona

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

a lament for lost grace

It was a happy place; happiness built on the foundations of unconditional faith and kept by the power of love. It was a place where the heart learned the wisdom of love, and the mind romanced every shade of the truth; where the timid soul borrowed courage from the legends of the greats, and the wayward wits sought direction in showers of dazzling light. It was a place where music permeated the very being, and like the cheeky bard at a Khan’s court, the spirit sang merrily without fear or regret; a place where color infused life’s every beautiful face, and the miraculous downpours of the monsoon made the bright shine brighter. It was a monument to eternal love, white, like the purity that reigned at its core, and red, like the smoldering embers of separation which kindled this love. It was where the wounded heart returned for solace and sanctuary, and all that was ever broken could be mended with sagely words exchanged softly, intimately; where the habit of giving was extolled over the pious virtue of remaining constantly expectant; where the summer was the coolest time of the year, and the winter beneficent in the warm glow of companionship. It was a place that stood out like an island of serenity amidst a swollen river of noxious decay.

He was the unquestioned master of this unlikely bastion of blessed living. He had built it up from naught, snatching away his birthright from the fangs of injustice. Upon his command the spring spread its cornucopia of color; the furrow of his regal brow deterred autumn from stealing away the greenery of his fief. His code of honor defined life; his sense of order set the plane of existence. He spoke with the cumulative wisdom of ages; he laughed that infectious laugh which never failed to fill his universe with mirth. He spoke and the world was mesmerized; he spoke and the most subdued of listeners got swept away in conversation. But carefully, respectfully, for no one high or low dared raise their voice to his. For his was a voice, like a clap of thunder; resonating across time through the halls and chambers; echoing far beyond the perimeters of his keep. That voice preserved the labors of his love; that voice daunted the ugliness from breaking in. Once alone was there a breach. Feeble in body, yet steadfast in spirit, he stood like a colossus in the face of a pygmy assault, compelling the enemy to retreat with shame in the eye and muffled apology on the tongue. That was to be his last stand. Not long after, that majestic voice would only be heard in the echoes it left behind.

His strength was not his alone. It was derived from a quieter, subtler presence behind him; a slender hand the touch of which was the sturdiness of his back, even in that final moment of truth; a soft voice that spoke to his limitless reserves of courage. She was the burning beacon of progress that lit up a firmament darkened by the absence of a single guiding light, and the suffocating shadow of small-mindedness and petty intrigue. She emerged on the horizon like a lone star that leads lost travelers in the wilderness of self-deceit to the oases of enlightenment. She was the force behind his passion to invent a whole new system of circumstances. Hers was the measured speech, the voice of reason, which tempered his fiery spirit; hers was the calm intellect, the moral compass, channeling the authority that emanated from him into charting new courses. She was his perfect complement, in a way that only two people from two different worlds can be. She upheld the faith and became equal partners in the lifelong task of creating wonders and keeping malevolence at bay. If he was the sculptor of an alternate destiny, hers was the image that it was to be cast in.

After his towering persona was consigned to the fading canvasses of memory, she held their world together with a forcefulness that was undoubtedly his bequest, and an arsenal of love that was entirely her very own. She, with her inimitable clarity of vision, always differentiating between the material and the spiritual, cherished valuing the soul over pricing its utility. As the years went by and enervation restricted movement, her place of genuflection to faith was the center of gravity around which all those specks of dust whom she had given life, orbited. She welcomed every new pulse of life with a kind of spontaneous joy that it would not probably deserve for many more years still. Her face lit up at the sight of every young tot, someone who would never really know her and who would only piece together her life, and his, from what his father or mother tell him; and yet, someone who would be living proof of her triumph. And when the time came for her to return to dust, she wore that same celestial light on her face that would overwhelm the darkness in her final abode, just as it had done in the realm of the mundane.

Now, one might ask, what of that world that they had so painstakingly created? That haven of peace and happiness? For all one can say, measuring the strength of love like that is actually a question for posterity. Right now, every silent, lifeless object, every inch of stone and concrete, every piece of wood and cloth, every plant and every tree, screams out the name of a life that used to be. And for those within earshot, that just means a lot of secret tears in solitary nooks and darkened crannies, where many more memories lie in wait.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

the broken anchor

kafan ki narm panahon mein se mumkin ho toh sunn
lehd k pak ujaalon mein se dikhta ho toh dekh

k gulistan e bazurgan pe jo guzri hai woh razm
kisi khamosh qayamat se kaheen kam toh nahi
her jhutlai huyi ah
pathrai huyi chashm
samaan e girya o maatam se kaheen kam toh nahi

sukarti khaak mein khoya hai laal e mehr o wafa
muneem e hashr sajaye hai dukanein apni
hissaar e haibat e gham ki faseelon per
naag o gurg ne taani hain kamanein apni

havas uriyan hai
aur azmaton ka laasha hai
shareef e waqt ka kaisa
zauq e tamasha hai?!

havaas bakhta hain sab sapoot e maslak e haq
yaqeen ka marqad hai, takht nasheen hai shak

koi toh ho jo samjhaye inhein sultani k umoor
aye khurshid siffat saakin e rehmat o noor
paya tu ne toh aaghosh e muwadat mein suroor,
mureed e Ghazi e be-kas, Asadullah k huzoor
per
koi jhalak teri reh jaye yaan bhi toh zuroor
dafn ho jaye kaheen duur
yeh fitna
yeh fatoor

warna ik zulmat si hai
her aan charhi aati hai

khizan deti hai dastak bar dar e shehr e yaar
ik maut si zardi hai, roothi hai bahar
her nafs pe taari hai khud parasti ka khumar
aankhein be-noor sabhi aur dushman hain hazaar

ye reet agar yoonhi chali aaye gi
saza e tangi e dil qabr talak jaye gi

sada tab bhi shayad yahee aaye gi

k kab ho jo koi tujh sa jahan mein aaye
kaun ho k teri dhaj se la-makan mein utrey?